Aye okay :-)
I've been M.I.A. for a while. Avoided some people, but definitely not the problem. I was a little depressed, but I'm fine now. As long as I keep myself occupied, and productive, I'll be straight. I seen Transformers II and I must say it was the fuckin' shit. Shia is sexy. And it's not even his looks. It's his personality that does it. A funny man can have my heart anyday. SHIT, I GUESS PERS0NALITY D0ES COUNT. Word? And I'm just now comprehending this shit? It took me a while to really soak that into my head. I previously cogigated that appearance was extremely crucial when considering whether or not to pursue a man. When we first meet someone, we are judging them in the first 3 seconds, regardless of how awry that shit is. We judge them by the way they dress, walk, talk, the things they do, and the habits they have. It is simply human nature, and when you fight it, you become hypocritical to your own actions. I, myself, judge or "observe" people almost everytime I meet them if not EVERY. It is then their obligation to prove me wrong on my observative assumptions. I have come across many men in my path. Wise beyond my years, let me tell you. Some I get at shallowly, only because I feel like there is nothing more to them than just a pretty face and a temporary good-time. I never actually expect an intense connection. So when I feel a vibe, that shit is amazing, and a beautiful surprise. With that being said, let me tell you about...nevermind. I'll save that for later. I tend to spoil things before they occur. So i'ma bite my tongue for now.
I went to Dallas this weekend to my girl Asa's party. She had a stripper pole in her house, haha. I didn't know anyone besides her at the party but I was feelin' nice so I didn't really bother. I really deserved to have fun, cause life just wasn't going my way. I met a couple people, some that already heard about me, but i was just chillen. I was being a little stank that night I must admit. I was supposed to sleep over, but I just felt uncomfortable at the end of the night and decided to drive all the way home by myself under the influence. But I was focused enough to get my ass from point A to point B. Although, I'm horrible with directions. And Dallas was an hour away from home. I liked driving alone...going somewhere far...with hardly no cars around on the highway. It was like 4 AM. I got lost once, but I found my way eventually. And when I got home, I couldn't unlock the top lock of the door. So I was draggin' my luggage back and forth tryna fuss with my key to open that motherfucker. I was contemplating on sleeping in the car, but then i'm like watch me wake up to some bum staring hard at me and shit. I ended up banging on the door, and my dad woke up to let me in. Then my mom showed me how to open the top lock. I swear my ass tried like a million times and that bitch didn't wanna open. And I had called like 50 times but ain't nobody wanna pick up! But I slept in my bed, and I slept good.
I was thinking really hard last night. I like doing things on my own. I don't like being the girl with a broken heart. I don't wanna be saved. I don't need a superman to take care of me. I can do that shit on my own. If I'm in a relationship, I want things to be mutual. I'll put in what you put in. So when and if it ends, atleast we can both say we didn't lose much. Someone I met over the weekend told me I must've had my heart broken by the way that I act. And it had me thinking, a lot. He's right.
Behind every bitch, there's a man who made her that way.
